环境

More and more people are choosing to travel to natural places that are untouched and have not been visited before. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

越来越多的人选择前往未被开发、从未有人到访过的自然地区旅行。这样做有哪些利弊?

立场: This essay will explore both the advantages of travelling to untouched natural areas, chiefly personal enrichment and new economic opportunities for local communities, and the disadvantages, namely environmental degradation and safety risks.本文将探讨前往未被开发的自然区域旅行所带来的优点——主要是个人成长和为当地社区带来的新经济机会,以及缺点——即环境退化和安全风险。

6.5 分

This answer stays fully correct and on-topic but develops each side of the argument with only one example, relies on basic linkers like 'However' and 'For example', and repeats plain vocabulary such as 'real danger' and 'new way to earn money' rather than more precise collocations.这篇作文全程语法正确、紧扣主题,但正反两方各只用一个例子来展开论证,依赖'However'、'For example'等基础连接词,并反复使用'real danger'、'new way to earn money'这类平实词汇,而非更精准的搭配。

Nowadays, more and more people want to travel to natural places that no one has visited before, instead of going to normal tourist spots. This trend has both advantages and disadvantages. On one hand, it brings personal benefits and new money for local people. On the other hand, it can damage the environment and be dangerous for tourists.如今,越来越多的人想去从未有人到访过的自然地区旅行,而不是去常规的旅游景点。这一趋势既有优点也有缺点。一方面,它给个人带来益处,也为当地人带来新的收入。另一方面,它可能破坏环境,并给游客带来危险。

One advantage is that travelling to wild places gives people a feeling of discovery and helps them relax after busy city life. For example, in Vietnam, many tourists now go to Sơn Đoòng cave in Phong Nha-Kẻ Bàng National Park, which is the biggest cave in the world. Also, more tourists go trekking in Tà Xùa in the north of Vietnam. Because of this, local villages near these places can open homestays and small restaurants for visitors. This gives local families, especially ethnic minority people, a new way to earn money that they did not have before.其中一个优点是,前往未开发的地区旅行能给人带来一种发现的感觉,并帮助人们在忙碌的城市生活后放松身心。例如在越南,许多游客现在会前往丰芽-己榜国家公园的山萝洞,这是世界上最大的洞穴。此外,也有越来越多的游客前往越南北部的塔许(Tà Xùa)徒步。因此,这些地方附近的村庄得以为游客开设民宿和小餐馆。这为当地家庭,尤其是少数民族家庭,提供了一种他们以前没有的新的赚钱方式。

However, this kind of tourism also has serious disadvantages. First, too many visitors can harm the environment. For example, more people walking around Phong Nha-Kẻ Bàng causes soil erosion and litter, and it can damage the cave system that took thousands of years to form. Second, these remote areas usually do not have good roads, phone signal, or rescue services. This means tourists can be in real danger if the weather suddenly changes or if they get lost in the mountains, and some hikers have even become stranded far from any help.然而,这种旅游方式也存在严重的缺点。首先,游客过多会对环境造成伤害。例如,在丰芽-己榜地区行走的人越来越多,导致水土流失和垃圾增加,还可能损害这个耗时数千年才形成的洞穴系统。其次,这些偏远地区通常没有良好的道路、手机信号或救援服务。这意味着如果天气突然变化,或游客在山中迷路,他们可能会面临真正的危险,甚至有一些徒步者曾因此被困在远离救援的地方。

In conclusion, although travelling to untouched natural places can bring personal enjoyment and new income for local communities, it also causes environmental damage and safety risks. Therefore, tourists and the government both need to be careful when developing this kind of tourism.总而言之,尽管前往未经开发的自然地区旅行能给人带来个人乐趣,并为当地社区带来新的收入,但它同时也会造成环境破坏和安全风险。因此,游客和政府在发展这类旅游时都需要格外谨慎。

搭配词汇

feeling of discovery · 发现的感觉busy city life · 忙碌的城市生活new way to earn money · 新的赚钱方式soil erosion · 水土流失phone signal · 手机信号real danger · 真正的危险safety risks · 安全风险

考官点评

  • TRThis trend has both advantages and disadvantages.A simple, direct thesis statement that signals a balanced advantages/disadvantages essay, though it lacks the more developed phrasing of a higher-band introduction.简单直接的论点句,表明这是一篇平衡讨论优缺点的文章,但不如高分作文引言那样表达更为丰富。
  • CCHowever, this kind of tourism also has serious disadvantages.The basic discourse marker 'However' clearly signals the shift from the advantages paragraph to the disadvantages paragraph.基础话语标记词 'However' 清楚地标示了从优点段落到缺点段落的转折。
  • LRgives people a feeling of discoveryA correct and appropriate but fairly ordinary collocation, safer and less vivid than the idiomatic phrasing used at higher bands.搭配正确、贴切,但较为普通,不如高分作文中地道生动的表达。
  • GRAThis means tourists can be in real danger if the weather suddenly changes or if they get lost in the mountainsA grammatically correct conditional structure with 'if', though simpler than the participial-plus-relative-clause construction used at band 7.5.使用'if'构成的条件句语法正确,但比7.5分作文中分词状语从句加定语从句的结构简单。
  • TRIn conclusion, although travelling to untouched natural places can bring personal enjoyment and new income for local communities, it also causes environmental damage and safety risks.The conclusion correctly restates the essay's balanced position without introducing new ideas.结论正确地重申了全文的平衡立场,没有引入新的观点。
7.0 分

This answer reaches 7.0 through richer collocations such as 'delicate ecosystems' and 'rising interest' and one well-built multi-clause sentence per body paragraph, but each paragraph still rests on a single reason and example rather than the reasoning-plus-example-plus-brief-counterpoint layering seen at 7.5.这篇作文凭借 'delicate ecosystems'、'rising interest' 等更丰富的搭配,以及每段一个结构完整的多从句长句,达到了7.0分水平,但每段仍只依靠一个理由加一个例子展开,未能像7.5分作文那样形成'论证+例证+简短反驳'的多层次论述。

An increasing number of tourists are choosing to visit natural places that have never been explored, rather than sticking to popular destinations. This trend has both clear advantages and disadvantages: it can bring personal satisfaction and economic benefits, but it can also cause environmental harm and put travellers at risk.越来越多的游客选择前往从未被开发过的自然地区,而不是坚持去热门景点。这一趋势既有明显的优点,也有明显的缺点:它能带来个人满足感和经济效益,但也可能造成环境损害,并使旅行者处于危险之中。

One major advantage is the sense of adventure and mental relaxation that exploring untouched places can offer, which is very different from the stress of everyday city life. In Vietnam, for instance, growing numbers of travellers are heading to Sơn Đoòng, the largest cave in the world, located in Phong Nha-Kẻ Bàng National Park, or trekking through the misty mountains of Tà Xùa in the north. This rising interest has created real economic opportunities for nearby communities, as villages along these routes now offer homestays, local guides and small restaurants, giving ethnic minority households a valuable new source of income that simply did not exist before.一个重要的优点是,探索未经开发的地区能带来冒险感和心理上的放松,这与日常城市生活的压力截然不同。例如在越南,越来越多的旅行者前往位于丰芽-己榜国家公园内、世界上最大的洞穴山萝洞,或是前往越南北部云雾缭绕的塔许山脉徒步。这种日益增长的兴趣为周边社区带来了实实在在的经济机会,因为沿线村庄如今提供民宿、当地向导和小餐馆,为少数民族家庭带来了此前根本不存在的宝贵新收入来源。

On the other hand, this type of tourism brings considerable disadvantages, particularly regarding the environment and personal safety. Even a small increase in visitor numbers can put pressure on delicate ecosystems; for example, growing foot traffic around Phong Nha-Kẻ Bàng has led to soil erosion, litter and disturbance to the cave environment, which took millions of years to form. In addition, because these remote regions often lack proper infrastructure, mobile signal or nearby medical help, tourists face genuine risks from sudden weather changes and difficult mountain terrain, and there have been cases of inexperienced hikers becoming stranded far from any rescue service.另一方面,这种旅游方式也带来了相当大的缺点,尤其是在环境和人身安全方面。即使游客数量只是小幅增加,也会给脆弱的生态系统带来压力;例如,丰芽-己榜周边不断增长的人流已导致水土流失、垃圾增多,并扰乱了这个耗费数百万年才形成的洞穴环境。此外,由于这些偏远地区往往缺乏完善的基础设施、手机信号或附近的医疗救助,游客面临着突发天气变化和艰险山地地形带来的真实风险,甚至已经出现经验不足的徒步者被困在远离任何救援服务之地的案例。

In conclusion, while exploring Vietnam's untouched natural landscapes can offer travellers real personal enrichment and bring welcome economic opportunities to remote communities, these advantages need to be weighed carefully against the environmental damage and safety hazards that such trips can involve.总而言之,尽管探索越南未经开发的自然景观能为旅行者带来真正的个人收获,并为偏远社区带来令人欣喜的经济机会,但这些好处仍需与此类旅行可能带来的环境破坏和安全隐患仔细权衡。

搭配词汇

sense of adventure · 冒险感mental relaxation · 心理上的放松rising interest · 日益增长的兴趣economic opportunities · 经济机会delicate ecosystems · 脆弱的生态系统soil erosion · 水土流失safety hazards · 安全隐患

考官点评

  • TRThis trend has both clear advantages and disadvantages: it can bring personal satisfaction and economic benefits, but it can also cause environmental harm and put travellers at risk.A clear, balanced thesis, though it lists the two sides mechanically rather than blending them into one fluid sentence as the 7.5 answer does.论点清晰、平衡,但两方面是机械地并列陈述,不像7.5分作文那样融合成一句流畅的句子。
  • CCOn the other hand, this type of tourism brings considerable disadvantages, particularly regarding the environment and personal safety.A clear transitional sentence marking the pivot to disadvantages, though 'On the other hand' is a more common device than the 7.5 answer's 'Conversely'.清晰的转折句标示了向缺点部分的过渡,但 'On the other hand' 比7.5分作文中的 'Conversely' 更为常见。
  • LRsense of adventure and mental relaxationA well-chosen paired collocation describing the psychological benefit, solid but less idiomatic than the 7.5 answer's 'profound sense of discovery and mental renewal'.搭配得当,描述了心理上的益处,表达扎实但不如7.5分作文中 'profound sense of discovery and mental renewal' 那样地道。
  • GRAbecause these remote regions often lack proper infrastructure, mobile signal or nearby medical help, tourists face genuine risks from sudden weather changes and difficult mountain terrain, and there have been cases of inexperienced hikers becoming stranded far from any rescue service.A long sentence joining a reason clause, a main clause and a further coordinated clause; accurate and reasonably controlled, though less tightly built than the participial-plus-relative-clause combination at band 7.5.长句连接了原因状语从句、主句以及并列从句;表达准确,结构较为清晰,但不如7.5分作文中分词状语从句加定语从句的组合那样紧凑。
  • TRIn conclusion, while exploring Vietnam's untouched natural landscapes can offer travellers real personal enrichment and bring welcome economic opportunities to remote communities, these advantages need to be weighed carefully against the environmental damage and safety hazards that such trips can involve.The conclusion accurately restates the balanced position established in the introduction, closing the essay coherently.结论准确地重申了引言中确立的平衡立场,使全文收尾连贯。
7.5 分

The 7.5 answer is distinguished by idiomatic collocations like 'profound sense of discovery' and 'burgeoning interest', a single long sentence that fuses a participial clause with a relative clause under full grammatical control, and the discourse marker 'Conversely' organising the whole essay around one genuinely balanced dual thesis.这篇7.5分作文的突出之处在于使用了 'profound sense of discovery'、'burgeoning interest' 等地道搭配,用一个长句将分词状语从句与定语从句融合并保持语法上的完全掌控,并以话语标记词 'Conversely' 将全文组织成一个真正平衡的双重论点结构。

An increasing number of travellers are seeking out remote, largely unexplored natural landscapes rather than conventional tourist destinations. This trend carries a genuine dual character, offering meaningful personal and economic rewards while simultaneously posing serious ecological and safety risks.越来越多的旅行者不再满足于传统旅游目的地,转而寻求偏远、尚未被大规模开发的自然景观。这一趋势具有真正的双重性:一方面带来了有意义的个人体验和经济收益,另一方面也带来了严重的生态和安全风险。

One clear advantage of venturing into untouched terrain is the profound sense of discovery and mental renewal it offers, a stark contrast to the noise and pressure of city life. Vietnam's own tourism landscape illustrates this vividly: the rise of expeditions into Sơn Đoòng, the world's largest cave system in Phong Nha-Kẻ Bàng National Park, and the growing popularity of trekking routes through the cloud-covered ridges of Tà Xùa in the northern mountains, have drawn adventurous travellers willing to pay substantial sums and undergo demanding physical preparation for the experience. This burgeoning interest brings tangible economic benefits to once-overlooked communities; villages near these trekking routes have seen the emergence of homestays, local guiding services, and small eateries catering to visitors, providing ethnic minority households in particular with income streams that were simply unavailable a decade ago.深入未被触及的地域,一个明显的好处是它所带来的深刻的发现感和心灵的复苏,这与喧闹、充满压力的城市生活形成了鲜明对比。越南自身的旅游业发展便是生动的例证:前往风芽-己榜国家公园内、世界最大洞穴系统山垌洞(Sơn Đoòng)的探险活动日益兴起,北部山区云雾缭绕的塔轩(Tà Xùa)徒步路线也越来越受欢迎,吸引了愿意支付高额费用、并做好充分体能准备的探险爱好者。这股日益增长的热潮为曾经被忽视的社区带来了实实在在的经济利益;这些徒步路线附近的村庄开始出现民宿、当地向导服务和迎合游客需求的小餐馆,尤其为少数民族家庭带来了十年前根本无法想象的收入来源。

Conversely, the disadvantages of this trend are considerable, centring on both environmental strain and genuine danger to travellers. Even modest visitor numbers can disturb fragile ecosystems: expanding foot traffic in and around Phong Nha-Kẻ Bàng has raised concerns among conservationists about soil erosion, litter, and disturbance to cave ecosystems that took millennia to form, while unregulated trekking in areas such as Tà Xùa or the remote reaches of the Central Highlands risks damaging fragile forest cover that helps prevent landslides. Moreover, these remote regions typically lack developed infrastructure, mobile signal, or nearby emergency services, leaving trekkers exposed to real danger from sudden weather changes, treacherous mountain terrain, and the kind of accidents that have occasionally made headlines when inexperienced hikers became stranded far from rescue.然而,这一趋势的缺点也相当显著,主要集中在环境压力和对旅行者本身的真实危险这两方面。即使是不算多的游客数量,也可能破坏脆弱的生态系统:风芽-己榜周边日益增加的人流,已引起环保人士对水土流失、垃圾污染以及扰乱历经数千年才形成的洞穴生态系统的担忧;而在塔轩或中部高原偏远地区不受管控的徒步活动,则有可能破坏那些有助于防止山体滑坡的脆弱森林植被。此外,这些偏远地区往往缺乏完善的基础设施、手机信号或附近的紧急救援服务,使徒步者面临突发天气变化、险峻山地地形,以及经验不足的徒步者因远离救援而受困等时有耳闻的意外事故的真实威胁。

In conclusion, while journeys into Vietnam's untouched natural landscapes offer travellers genuine personal enrichment and bring welcome economic opportunity to remote communities, these benefits must be carefully weighed against the ecological damage and considerable safety hazards that such expeditions can entail.总之,尽管深入越南未被开发的自然景观能为旅行者带来真正的个人收获,也为偏远社区带来了可喜的经济机会,但这些好处必须与此类探险活动可能造成的生态破坏和相当大的安全隐患仔细权衡。

搭配词汇

profound sense of discovery · 深刻的发现感mental renewal · 心灵的复苏burgeoning interest · 日益增长的热潮fragile ecosystems · 脆弱的生态系统unregulated trekking · 不受管控的徒步活动soil erosion · 水土流失treacherous mountain terrain · 险峻的山地地形considerable safety hazards · 相当大的安全隐患

考官点评

  • TRThis trend carries a genuine dual character, offering meaningful personal and economic rewards while simultaneously posing serious ecological and safety risks.States a clear, balanced thesis in the introduction that both sides of the essay will develop.在引言中提出了清晰、平衡的论点,为全文的正反论述定下基调。
  • LRprofound sense of discovery and mental renewalIdiomatic collocation used naturally to describe the psychological benefit of remote travel.自然运用的地道搭配,用来描述偏远旅行带来的心理益处。
  • CCConversely, the disadvantages of this trend are considerable, centring on both environmental strain and genuine danger to travellers.Discourse marker 'Conversely' clearly signals the pivot from the advantages paragraph to the disadvantages paragraph.话语标记词 'Conversely' 清楚地标示了从上一段优点到本段缺点的转折。
  • GRAleaving trekkers exposed to real danger from sudden weather changes, treacherous mountain terrain, and the kind of accidents that have occasionally made headlines when inexperienced hikers became stranded far from rescue.A participial clause followed by a relative clause builds one long, controlled sentence out of several linked ideas.分词状语从句后接定语从句,将多个相关信息组织成一个结构复杂但控制得当的长句。
  • TRthese benefits must be carefully weighed against the ecological damage and considerable safety hazards that such expeditions can entail.The conclusion restates the essay's balanced position rather than introducing new, unaddressed ideas.结论重申了全文的平衡立场,而非引入未经论述的新观点。